Sunday, February 15, 2009

A Sweet Valentine

Posted by Brittany, 2-15-09
Yes indeed it was a very sweet Valentine's Day for Addie Ting-Ting, and this was not because of her sweet behavior. On the contrary little Miss Ting-Ting is developing quite a personality of protesting when things are not going the way she wants. We know this fiery spirit is a good sign after months of being so passive, but her craving for sweets and her mini tantrums when the cookies are gone or the fudge has been put out of sight, are quite something. For example right now she is growling at Ron because he is not feeding her the hot fudge sundae fast enough. Brother Jo-Jo has been sick this week and lost some weight. Now truly when I look at them side by side I wonder who weighs more-my almost 5 year old or my almost 2 year old?


Refusing to sit down in the sink for her bath!!!




This Friday Ting-Ting had some special visitors. Teresa and her young daughter Stacy came for a visit. They are from Taiwan and do business here in Milbridge buying sea cucumber skins from Uncle Lawrence's processing plant. The spent an hour or so visiting and speaking Chinese to Addie. I wasn't sure she would know what they were saying, but it appeared that she did understand, and at times she was very excited by their conversation.





Ron was able to make a nice short video of our Chinese New Year Party. Everyone who came has commented they had fun, so it seems that plans are already in the works to make this an annual celebration.





We received a call just the other day from our home study agency indicating it is almost time to do the follow-up 6 month post placement study. It is hard to believe that soon she will have been with us for six months. She has grown and changed so much, and so totally belongs here with us.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Happy New Year




Tonight was a first in our family- Our first celebration of the Chinese New Year. Several months ago Tommy, Bayley, and Jo-Jo decided it would be an excellent way to honor their new sister and allow us to learn more about Addie Ting's culture while having fun. We dressed all in red, ate lots of dumplings and lo mein noodles, and exchanged small red presents Yankee Swap style. Tommy was in charge of the lantern riddle game. These Chinese riddles were quite difficult. All of the kids danced in the lion dance, screamed when the firecrackers were lit, and as is the custom, each of us took turns sweeping dirt out the front door to symbolize "out with the old and in with the new." Ting-Ting enjoyed the festivities, but without a doubt she had one very favorite activity- eating dried fish. You see- fish is symbolic of abundance and always eaten for Chinese New Year; thus, we decided to give the symbolism a Down East twist with the dried fish. Most of the evening Addie Ting could be seen chewing away on the fish prepared especially for her party by her Uncle Lawrence.





Tonight's celebration provided another chance to reflect on how lucky we are to have this little girl in our lives. She continues to grow and change so fast. She now growls when asked to be a bear, cannot get enough of playing "this little piggy", and loves to rough-house with her siblings. She is really walking fast now and can even do some fancy spinning and twirling. She is saying Buppa and Nana frequently along with Mama, Dada, kitty, sis, and Gee-Gee (meaning Tommy). Another very exciting happening has been the fact that finally when Ting-Ting falls down, she now cries. For the longest time she would fall or bump her head and never cry. This was a bit worrisome, as if she didn't sense pain. Well all that has changed now- in fact she may be a bit of a drama queen, crying after even tiny falls or ever so little bumps.

Last week Ting-Ting's friend Abigail came over for the day. They are the same age. Abigail came home from China just two weeks before us. When we first got the two girls together in October it was quite sad, because no play could really happen. Abigail was developmentally on target and could play like a typical 18 month old, but Addie on the other hand, could not sit well, crawl at all, let alone walk or smile or play with toys. This play date was so different, and we are so thankful and encouraged by the enormous progress Addie Ting had made. Now just 3 months later the girls were able to run about, giggle, and have lots of fun.



Happy New Chinese New Year To All!

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Where To Begin ?




It's been just over a month since I have updated Addie's blog. I think my inability to keep up in a timely fashion has much to do with the fact I returned to work right after Thanksgiving. It certainly was hard to leave this little girl, but I do take great comfort in the fact we have the most outstanding child care provider. She has cared for all of our children, and the loving bond between Addie and Lori is already obvious. Addie Ting seems to enjoy the activity at childcare with all the other children, and while there of course, she is catered to and nurtured by big brother Jo-Jo as well. Indeed they are best of friends, and watching their bond grow has been so wonderful.




While at daycare Addie's walking progressed so rapidly, most likely because of her efforts to keep up with the others. She also has really taken to EATING. In fact the little gal who struggled to swallow only three months ago eats everything in sight. This reminds us of her brother Tommy who just cannot get enough to eat these days. At daycare Addie must always be seated next to Jo-Jo because she has quite a habit of swiping food from others, and it seems just a bit more appropriate if she swipes from her own brother. This week I remarked how she gulps down black olives, drinks English Breakfast Tea with intensity, smacks her lips at lobster, and loves dried strip fish. She coos as she chews on the salt fish, so we know she adores it. Sister Bayley, on the other hand, gets quite perturbed with Ting's fishy breath.

Christmas festivities have been lots of fun with all of our kids. At the childcare Christmas party while her brother cowered in the corner when Santa arrived, Addie bravely marched to his lap and checked out his beard. She seemed so excited to decorate the tree with her siblings and was ever so delicate when she touched our tree. Presents were interesting to her only because of her love for paper and strings and bows. She received lots of dolls for her first Christmas, but she really appears to have an interest in things like blocks, swords, DVD's, or all items used by the older kids.


Actually I should also include that she is infatuated with computers. When she sees her father sit down at the computer, she races to him and rapidly and in quite a rough manner pounds at the keys.


Addie is making some great gains in many areas. She has finally learned two very important signs- MORE and ALL GONE. These simple communication tools are exciting, as they give our little one the power to meaningfully say what she wants. When asked to "patty cake" Addie will travel across the room and grab my hands to begin clapping. It seems that since it was Mommy who taught her to do the game, she believes that she can only do "patty cake" using Mommy's hands. Addie knows how to "give me five" and she jumps by raising her heels when asked to jump. She delights in emptying folded laundry from baskets. When looking at a book and she is asked which picture is the banana, she slaps at the right picture. Pointing is still not something she is doing. Her favorite game this week is the "Up and Down" game. When we say "down" she squats down and when we say "up" she proudly stands straight up. Her language skills are emerging in a very interesting pattern, and we are unsure what this means. So far she has attempted to say "mama, dada, sis, nana, nannie, buppa, up, teeth, kitty, coke, and duck." The strange thing is that she will usually only say one or two of these words in a given day. She will practice those two words for a day and then the next day not say them but practice two different ones. Truly she seems so much happier now than she did three months ago. Without a doubt, we are a blessed family with all the joy she brings.

We still do have struggles that may take lots and lots of time. In addition to Addie Ting's speech and physical therapy, we have been consulting with a social worker who focuses on attachment. After completing a series of activities whereby Ron and I were filmed separately interacting with Addie, we were able to watch the results of the assessment. Though we had not noticed, upon watching the tape, it became immediately apparent that Addie struggles and actually avoids eye contact. She almost fools us by looking at our noses or mouths, and when watching people she looks at the action, but any moments of eye contact are fleeting at best. If our gazes do meet, her eyes are quickly averted. Addie's lack of eye contact is especially apparent when we compare her to other children her age and younger. These children easily make eye contact, even with strangers, while Addie cannot yet do this with those who love her. After reading and researching about poor eye contact, it is clear that this is a trust and attachment issue. Surely it will come, but for now her sweet kisses will have to be enough. Additionally Addie struggles with sleep. At childcare she resists napping and usually falls asleep sitting up. At home she does not nap or sleep alone. At times this is a struggle because her bedtime and my bedtime or Ron's bedtime must coincide. Throughout the night she startles and sits up to check where we are. She then touches my face and kneads my chest and neck with her hands. This cycle repeats itself many times each night. Sometimes the nights are long, but it wasn't so very long ago that many nights were long and I had trouble falling asleep as I lay wondering where she was and who was caring for her in China. Now the comfort of knowing Addie Mei Ting is with us where she belongs, far outweighs her restless nights, and one day we know she will sleep soundly and without fear of abandonment.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Guaranteed By Thanksgiving


This week my wise Uncle Lawrence's words had reason to be ringing in my ears. You see, when we brought Little Addie Ting Ting home just two months ago, and she could just barely sit up, and she could really not hold much weight on her legs, it was Uncle Lawrence who kept remarking how she really was quite strong, while the rest of us shook our heads at how weak she seemed. When we commented how sad it was that she was delayed and didn't know how to communicate or give good loves, Uncle Lawrence claimed she was one of the smartest babies he had met. I just rolled my eyes and said, "Sure she is." One day after we had been home just a week, he said, "I guarantee she'll be walking by Thanksgiving!" Considering that head control and sitting were just emerging, I replied "Yeah right." Well, Addie Mei Ting decided to prove me wrong and her Uncle Lawrence right. Just a few nights ago she was playing with some of Jo-Jo's handcuffs, and I remarked how they were dangerous toys, and I would be taking them away. Just as I said this, she stood up in the middle of the floor and took several wobbly steps. From then on those wobbly few steps have turned into more and more steps, though she is very cautious and still trying to figure out the balance thing. She has a wonderful bruise on her nose from her first major fall, and her physical therapist said I could keep trying to promote crawling, but it looked like Addie was going to do things her way.

Here is a short video Ron made to document how thankful we are to have Addie in our lives and home at last with her brothers and sister where she belongs.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

And the answer is "NO"


Most often when I think of November, I think of cool days and cold nights, turkeys and pies, and of course giving thanks for family and friends. This November something else also comes to mind, because November is National Adoption Month.


Not flesh of my flesh
Nor bone of my bone,
But still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute,
You didn't grow under my heart,
But in it.


anonymous



Another week has flown by, and Addie Mei Ting continues to surprise us with all she is learning. She has developed a great love of shoes. Several weeks ago, she started just by playing with laces, but this week she loves putting her own feet in anyone's shoes that are available. On Saturday, Addie enjoyed visiting with many, many people at a baby shower for her soon to be cousin Natalie. The way she enjoyed playing with the presents and pulling on the bows and ribbons, lets us know that her first Christmas at home will be a magical one. In the eating department, Ting Ting has decided that she likes to use a spoon by herself. Now, she cannot quite get the spoon into the dish and get food on it, but once someone gets the food on the spoon, she snatches the utensil, and in the mouth it goes. This is quite an accomplishment considering just several weeks ago, she freaked out whenever a spoon came near her mouth. Mobility-wise, we are getting faster scoots across the room, some pretty good balance while standing, and a few steps here and there. She is also showing improvements with her fine motor skills as she plays with toys and especially blocks. And of course we cannot forget to mention Ting Ting's new fascination with shaking her head "No" at EVERYTHING. The kids get quite a kick out of it when we ask her "Do you love Mama?" or "Are you a good girl?" and she vigorously shakes her head "NO."

Monday, November 10, 2008

Smiles, Some Standing, and a Very Slimy Nose



Addie Ting Ting continues to grow and change each and every day. Indeed she is still a mighty serious girl, and we are still bombarded with the question by both strangers and acquaintances, "Does she ever smile?" The answer is "yes" but only in the very safest surroundings and with familiar faces. To be sure, it is a most precious smile. Addie is also making big changes in the amount of time she is willing to spend on her stomach. This week she is doing a tiny bit of a scoot on her bottom and then into a crawl position and then a forward flop on her belly. It is extremely awkward looking, but the important thing is - it is movement, and we think she rather likes the idea of being able to independently move, even if it is just a bit.






Addie is doing better in the eating department as well. She has decided on two favorite foods this week. Banana is number one. Number two we discovered quite by accident when dining out with Nannie (Ting Ting's great grandmother). Nannie ordered graham cracker pie with lots of real whip cream. Little Miss Addie quickly moved into attack mode, grabbing both the spoon and plate from Nannie. Her smacking lips and pig-like noises were quite entertaining.



Addie is doing more and more standing now. It seems that her muscle strength has improved a great deal, but now what really is the stumbling block is balance and slow reflexes when falling. We have great hopes that piece by piece the walking puzzle will eventually fit together. Oh and certainly another first for Addie has been her first American cold. It has lasted and lasted, and every day she wakes in the morning with a slimy nose, and despite boxes and boxes of tissues, she still usually has that same slimy look at bedtime.






Jo-Jo and Addie are truly becoming best friends. Bayley and Addie are already fashion sisters in their matching pajamas, and brother Thomas continues to touch our hearts with comments about the adoption. Just tonight he added, "It is so wonderful that God gave us this perfect child so filled with curiosity."


Saturday, November 1, 2008

A Little Ladybug




Happy Halloween- Bayley and Tommy picked out this little ladybug costume for Addie months before she ever came home. At the rate she has been growing it was a tight fit, but a definite must for her costume considering that ladybugs are a good luck symbol to those who are or have adopted from China. Trick or Treating was quite a challenge with our crew. Addie decided she wouldn't ride in her stroller, and Jo-Jo decided he wouldn't walk, and so we pushed a heavy stroller with a 4 and a half year old bat, and carried a pretty hefty ladybug, all while trying to keep up with Bayley , the corpse bride, Tommy, explorer Samuel Champlain, Myah, the vampire, Brynn, a real spooky creature, and frightful looking but friendly witch, Anna.





Addie is making some very positive steps forward, but her many therapies require lots of time. Sadly she did have a few scary medical issues with her bowels that needed immediate attention, and perhaps we are now on our way to some less scary days with her not passing out when it comes time for having a poopy. Last week she visited the daycare she will soon be attending and really seemed to enjoy watching all the kids. She even gave a few kisses to some children. Super exciting, is the way she now enjoys looking at herself in the mirror. It sure is cute to watch her kiss herself in the mirror. We now have a toddler sized medical walker from Addie's physical therapist. Clearly Addie Ting wants to walk and hopefully her muscles will cooperate soon. She is so proud after she walks across the kitchen using her walker, and she is very impressed when Jo-Jo does wheelies with her walker.





Bath time is becoming much more fun for Addie with all the splashing, and since she bathes in the sink, Jo-Jo has changed his pattern of tub or shower bathing to sink bathing.



At last she stole her Mama's diet coke. Coke was one of Jo-Jo's first words. Will it be one of Ting-Ting's too? She is now looking around and glancing toward the floor when asked "where's the kitty-cat?", so it seems there is some receptive language starting to emerge. Also when we are snuggling in bed, and I ask if she wants her bottle, she sits right up, and looks toward the door as if to say-"Yes-go get it please."



Oh and if trying to drink diet coke wasn't unhealthy enough, she ended the week by having her first Reeses Peanut Butter Cup. After a doctor's appointment in Bangor, she went to meet her Aunt Becky and Timmy at their store. While there I tried to feed her a healthy lunch, but she opted to raid the shelves of candy. Auntie didn't say "no."